


When You Love Somebody

by mggislife2789



Category: Criminal Minds, Spencer Reid - Fandom
Genre: F/M, Postpartum Depression
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-02-13
Updated: 2017-02-13
Packaged: 2018-09-24 04:06:18
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 730
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9699809
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/mggislife2789/pseuds/mggislife2789
Summary: Disclaimer: I don't own any of these characters or their original stories. This is only for fun. It's where my brain goes after the credits roll. No copyright intended. Better safe than sorry. ;)





	

Why was the happening?

When you were pregnant with Charlotte, you’d been nothing short of ecstatic. The idea of you and Spencer being parents filled you with a joy you could barely describe. You knew Spencer would be a wonderful father and you had confidence in yourself as a mother. Sure, it would be scary and new, but you’d had the most amazing relationship with your parents and had always imagined having a similar one with your own children.

But then she was born. You loved her. You didn’t want to hurt her. But something was NOT right. This couldn’t go on this way; you’d been depressed in the past and knew the dark turns it could take. Little Charlotte was only four weeks old, but as soon as Spencer walked in, you blurted out all your fears.

“Spence, something’s wrong,” you whispered, combing your finger over the delicate fuzz that was Charlotte’s hair. 

“With Charlotte?” he asked worriedly, coming to kneel by your side.

“Me,” you said as you leaned your head into his. “Something’s wrong with me.”

The way he looked at you made you realize he knew it too. He could tell that this wasn’t just being a scared new mom; it was much heavier than that. “What’s wrong?”

“I can’t do anything,” you started, not knowing where to begin. You felt everything and nothing; it was a weird combination you couldn’t describe without rambling. “I’m completely overwhelmed. I cry all the time. I can barely eat. I can’t settle down. My thoughts are constantly racing. I’m always afraid that I’m fucking up this mom thing and she knows it. I’m always on edge. Like last week when I yelled at you because the spoon wasn’t clean and you were the one that did the dishes. That’s not me. I don’t go off on you or anyone else for that matter because of stupid stuff. I just can’t control anything and I’m scared.” As you trailed off, you started to cry again, stifling your cries in Spencer’s shoulder. 

“We should go to the doctor. This week,” he said, smoothing your hair back and away from her face. “We’ll all go together.” You continued to cry, thankful for the support of such an amazing husband. 

——-

That weekend, you, Spencer and Charlotte ended up at the doctor’s office. When you all went in, Spencer took care of Charlotte’s every need so that you could explain your feelings and symptoms to the doctor. “I’m just…really scared,” you finished, relaxing into your husband’s embrace. “And I’ve been on Prozac in the past, but I’m breastfeeding and I don’t know if I should be on that while I’m breastfeeding, and…”

“Shhh…” Spencer whispered in your ear. “Breathe.” 

“He’s right,” you doctor said. “Antidepressants can actually be used while breastfeeding if it’s in small doses, but if you’re really scared, let’s try counseling first. I’ll refer you to a psychiatrist I know that specializes in postpartum depression and anxiety.”

“I have both?” you asked, feeling like you’d “won” the jackpot.

He nodded. “Yes. Having both is a like being on a roller coaster that only goes up and down and doesn’t stop.”

That is definitely how you were feeling. You’d been diagnosed with both as a teenager, but having a baby on top of that - it was excruciatingly difficult. When you stood up to leave the office, you reached for Charlotte, but Spencer insisted you let him take care of Charlotte for the day. “As soon as we get home, I want you to make your first appointment with the psychiatrist and if you can, make it for when I’m home, so you can go without having to take Charlotte with you.”

Once you returned to the car, Spencer situated Charlotte in her car seat and began the drive home. “How are you feeling?” he asked, upon hearing you sigh. 

“A little more relieved knowing that I’m not insane,” you chuckled softly. “Better knowing that I have such a supportive husband. Thank you.”

“For what?” he asked, thankful that Charlotte had immediately fallen asleep.

You looked over. She was so beautiful and you wanted to be the mother she deserved. “Not everyone is as supportive as you are, or as understanding. Just…thank you.”

“There’s no need to thank me, Y/N,” he said. “That’s what you do when you love somebody.”


End file.
